You smiled the blue sky
floated round in silver pieces
the air tasted sweet
Colours passed through me
Raining from the stars
Each had a flavor, a feeling
Each had a bigger smile
The sun walked with me
stretching, living
Voicing its golden words
It kissed the land-trickling
into the warm breath of night
Bathing in burning rays of fire

This morning you cried grey sky
Hanging from my head
Dragging back my hair
I tried to swallow my heart
like a boy caught smoking
my sleeve caught fire
You watched impassive
through closed eyes.

When the sun rose
It was a dry hard biscuit


Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

This is a bit of a reworking of something I wrote a while back. Happy Bank holiday

5:36 PM  
Blogger Carbanion Tolodine said...

I fear to know what's happen when i understand it between the line but i'm not a Psy so i don't want to do that. I love the style but it's look sad in the end for me.

Take care of yourself.

11:44 PM  
Blogger jadedprimadonna said...

Sad, but very true to life, I think. I love the analogy about breathing in like a school boy caught smoking. And I love the reality of the disappointment setting in as a hard biscuit.

3:54 AM  
Blogger Pincushion said...

You come up the with the most incredible and unusual of imagery and metaphors..I just love it!
The analogy of a hard biscuit was brilliant..you make me look at things differently.
Thank you.

5:01 PM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Carba it was about being sad but it was about sadness long ago and is not hurtful anymore

Jade P thankyou, dissapointment makes the world a very different place and that moment of exposure that can make your heart leap painfully

Pins I'm so pleased that is a wonderful compliment, when we're in love even grey days are bright and sunny and of course the opposit is true of sadness and lonelyness

6:19 PM  
Blogger Stormy Zephyr said...

Hello, I stumbled upon your blog. Your poem is very nice and vivid in its images.

5:46 AM  
Blogger Prmod Bafna said...

How very vivid! as if i could feel the words. I'll always wonder what made the lines
When the sun rose
It was a dry hard biscuit
come out.. you are simply amazing sue! you rock! :p

8:11 AM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Stormy Z so pleased you dropped by

Promd B I don't know what to say thankyou so much

11:27 AM  
Blogger iamnasra said...

This what I a poetry in every way...The sense are so powerful...

10:06 PM  
Blogger jenn see said...

fascinating...i'm strangely disturbed by the image of the sun as a dry biscuit.

10:49 PM  
Blogger Cocaine Jesus said...

was it a ginger nut?

lovely poem.

8:35 AM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Dear all, my internet is playing up badly so I'm having great difficulty posting, so don't think I'm ignoring everyone it's just difficult to get any of the blogging pages to load, meanwhile thanks for the many lovely comments.

4:13 PM  
Blogger MAHARAJADHIRAJ said...

Most amazing! I read and swallowed my heart, like a boy caught smoking...

7:12 PM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

It can cause hicups

8:31 PM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Or is that the diaphram?

8:36 PM  
Blogger finnegan said...

Had trouble posting my comments on your site (for whatever reason yours was the only one not cooperating for days and days).

Now I will try to pin this up again to say what a swell poem the poemcat has posted.

It is a Sunday here and the mood is not far from the one you make so vivid and oddly alluring.

1:45 PM  
Blogger Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Fin it must be a widespread prob the blogogiste strikes again thank-you for your wonderful comment

2:27 PM  
Blogger GEL said...

(Blogger just ate my comment so if it double posts, sorry!)
Please note: I don't read the comment thread until *after* I post my thoughts.

This piece throbs with harsh pain. You presented the up and down with bare precision and flare. If this is personal, as it seems, huge hugs to you, dear Sue!

11:47 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home